Monday, May 7, 2012

I'm Carrie Bradshaw

Well, I've already started slacking on my daily post promise. That was pretty quick, no? Nothing is happening that I feel like I need to remember when I come back to read this in a couple of years. Also, what is interesting to me, is totally boring to someone else. Maybe because I tend to get obsessed with one thing and it's all I focus on and want to talk about. I say that because I want to talk about what I am currently focused on. Let's start with a concern. A morality concern. Never had I "Facebook stalked" or googled a person I was interested to death. I think because before Jt and I started seeing each other, that was not a thing? Obviously when we got together I didn't have a reason to google  men so that  just passed me by. Moving on. I got the google bug when I found out my crushtomers last name. I felt disgusting! That's how I know I was doing something that is not necessarily wrong, but isn't right either. He has little to no web presence as they say but I still found out things that I should not have known because he didn't tell me personally. When does it go from innocent curiosity to weird? Answer: it's always weird! Edit: looking up a name on Facebook is not terribly strange. Looking it up several times to the point that when you type in the first letter of their name it pops up first thing, that's when it's gone too far. I have gone to far. I am sure when we are deep into an emotionally and physically fulfilling relationship, I will tell him and we will laugh. While that was totally a joke, it too is not healthy. Let's move on.

I went on a date yesterday. That's about all I can say. Dating is a strange thing. I have been saying that I can't wait to start seeing someone and feeling those awesome nerves, the excitement, holding hands with someone for the first time, all that fun fun stuff. I didn't get any of that. Maybe we'll go out once more but I don't see it going anywhere.

On a lighter note, I have 3 avocados and I'm going to eat all of them. You heard me.

Sunday, April 29, 2012


ALSO! I asked Jt if he would consider writing a letter of recommendation for me to give to Astronaut Mike Dexter, who we called Captain Upright, and get it notarized. Best idea I have ever heard of. Having your ex write a formal letter of recommendation? What the what!? You would never get a more honest opinion of a person, am I right? Obviously he agreed.

aww crap

Seriously another amazing day that I don't feel like blogging about! I am so tired. To sum up yesterday, I watched 'Cabin in the Woods' and I'd like to get more into that later. I later went to Margaret's house and ate some beans and watched TV and it was amazingly relaxing. I think that's how you know that you have a friend. When you can just relax and not feel like you have to entertain each other. When you can bring over a coffee and they are not hell bent on repaying you for it. When you can say "I don't agree one bit with what you are saying but I still want to hang out with you". Friends.

Today was nice a relaxing as well. I am finally able to admit to myself that wearing sunglasses gives me a headache, no matter how cute they are. I met up with Jt to get the car registration taken care of, for real this time. It has been the lingering reminder of our relationship for months now. Knowing that this was potentially the absolute last time we would purposefully see each other was very bittersweet. We got to talking, as we always do during our "here's some of your stuff" meetings, and we ended up hanging out in the Ingles parking lot for a few hours having the best and most candid conversation we've had in maybe years. During our relationship we were these weird versions of ourselves that were kind of fake and liars in a sense? Now that there is no pressure at all between us, no stress of everyday couple things, no bills to talk about, no dinner talk, it is nothing but 2 people who are comfortable with each other that underneath it all still want to be able to share thier life with the other person. I just wanted to scream "look at how happy we are separately! Isn't this so awesome?? I am so happy that you are happy and I am happy that you are happy that I am happy!!!"

When it seemed to take only a short time to get over our breakup, I worried that maybe I was just fooling myself and that one day I would go berserk. That is not the case. Then I felt as if I would be fine as long as I never had to see him with someone else. Not too long ago I revisited that scenereo and if I were to see him with someone else I would be so happy for him and I would make some lewd sexual gesture while pointing at her and giving him the thumbs up. I know now he would give me the same respect. We are just emotionally healthy and awesome like that. We also shared some things tonight that I don't think are normal for ex's to discuss but it was honestly a lot of fun and I hope we get to hang out some time in the future and I can give him some more advice on picking up ladies. I gave him some platinum advice, that's all I can say about that. His advice to me was maybe I should look for men at Harris Teeter because they are old and have a little bit of the cash. Not platinum advice but still pretty good.

Then I came home! Roomy Brian is home. I've missed his face! I am looking forward to doing little to nothing tomorrow. I have no cleaning to do that I can think of, not a lot of cash to do anything entertaining, and no reason to wake up early. Sounds dreamy.

Saturday, April 28, 2012


What a swell day! I will talk about it tomorrow!

Friday, April 27, 2012


What a B-U-S-T of a day. I can't remember this morning so we'll just say that nothing exciting happened. It seems like a lifetime ago. The afternoon is also a little blurry. I think some funny stuff happened but I can't be sure. I honestly have some subject matter to touch on but it never seems to be the right time to get up in there and talk about it.

I have eaten pizza 3 days in a row and I wanted to break that cycle tonight. Hint: Not Happening. I am elbow deep in cheesy pepperoni wonder.

Fun right? It will get more interesting, I promise. Hopefully.

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Blast From the Past Friday!!!!

So. I have been looking over my journal from years ago and what always seemed really funny to me just seems super boring now. Obviously I will feel the same about reading this 10 years from now. The plan was to just copy and paste an entry once a week, in order, from my old journal but it has been a struggle to find something even a tiny bit entertaining. Most of it is boys I thought were cute, work sucks talk, people I can't remember, and complaints that sound way too familiar. Well, that is kind of what I am going through now?? Strange. Anway. Here is a random entry, cleaned up a little.

31st July 2004

1:57am: i want to be a librarian
i want to learn how to play the banjo
i want robin to learn how to play the fiddle
we can have a band
i want to wake up in the morning, go be a librarian, wear cardigans and hair scarfs, come home, play the banjo, and eat macaroni and cheese.
i want to date a guy that is a little taller than me and a little funnier than me. thats pretty hard because i am damn funny.
i dont want to drink but i want to drink red wine out of a plastic cup. maybe i just want grape juice. jesus juice. with macaroni and cheese.
i am not asking for much people!
Interesting, right?

Already skipping days....not a good sign

No post yesterday! Nothing super exciting happened. Worked, came home, ran errands with Harmony, came home again. I did eat half a pizza and drank beer in a can for the first time.

I still trying to figure out how exactly to blog successfully. Even though I have had an online journal since the Diaryland and Livejournal days, I've never really gotten it right. I blame run-on sentances, no clear subject matter, lack of pictures, and generally bad writing. Also, the years of not capitalizing has made years of entries all but impossible to read.

I am also never sure how to end entries....

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

I said I would post everyday....

....but I didn't say it would be a long entry! BOOM!

Highlights of today:

-Woke up.

-Went to work.

-Waited on Astronaut Mike Dexter to come in.

-Resumed living normally after his regular time came and went.

ugh, lists are exhausting. Let's type regular style. Who uses the right shift key? Are you supposed to use it? I just used it to make that '?' so I guess I just answered my own stupid question. Why won't this thing Autocorrect?? Having to put in my own....what are those things called? ? ? Oh my goodness, I can't think of what those things are. It's<-----in that word. Upper Comma. I refuse to Google it, I refuse to think about it anymore, and I am sure it will come to me at some point. Anyway.

I came home and honestly that's pretty much it. I talked to Robin for a few hours, watched the first 10 minutes of a few movies, took a couple of cat naps, ate some food, and now I'm here. My biggest concern at this second is my injured left index finger. I smashed it in a door and I am worried that the nail is going to fall off. It's a really stressful and hectic life I lead. My second biggest concern is whether or not it was a good idea to eat 2 fiber one bars before bed. Only time will tell.

Tomorrow I plan on passing a grown man a note. I am also a grown up and I'm really not sure how appropriate my plan is. What passed as cute when I was in my early 20's may not fly now? Again, time will tell. Hopefully he will see how adorable it is and text me immediately....if he is a texting type of person. He doesn't seem to be. Deal breaker? Who knows. It's Astronaut Mike Dexter. Thanks 30 Rock.

There. I posted. Nothing exciting but "them's the berries", as they say. Who says that? No one.


Monday, April 23, 2012

Seriously. you guys. I'm serious. I'm really going to do it this time.

Since I last posted a blog entry: I have moved twice, I am now a single lady, I started eating 100% more avocado, and....really those are the biggest changes in my life.

I moved to Hendersonville after the Great Break-up of 2012 and the best part of that was knowing for sure that I was the coolest person in town. Henersonville was pretty grim? Maybe because going through something emotional when you are further away from family, friends, or any familiar person than you have ever been is a little intense. Plus the shower in the house I was staying in was a solid 3 feet by 3 feet box of cold water terror. That's never a plus. I would have to say, and I've said it a million times that living in the Bachelorette Cottage in Hendersonville was the best possible situation at the time and had it not been for Aaron, my boss, I would have had no choice but to move back home and I am really not sure what that would have been like. I didn't realize till after going through the break-up that I have people that care about me and I have people that I can call when things go bad, when something goes wrong, when I just need to talk. I seriously thought I was alone in life. I just had JT. And when that stopped happening, I just panicked at the thought of being absolutely alone. No way, that was not the case. I was surrounded by not only my best friend (woot, Robin C.), but by Harmony and Margaret who have since become my #2 BFF's. I am not 30 yet, I can still use the term BFF, fact. I have to say that I got over the break-up abnormally quickly, even though I was sure during the first 2 weeks that I was going to die and no one on the Earth had gone through anything as painful. JT and I are not hangin' out buddies by any means but we are on great terms and if and when I see that dude out and about, I am going to say "good to see you!" and if I see him with a lady friend I will give him the thumbs up and maybe a friendly air hump as if to say "I hope you are going to hit that tonight old friend, get yours!". I would hope nothing less from him. All in all, pretty positive stuff coming out of the whole situation.

Moving on. I am back in Asheville. Living with Brian, who was a strong acquaintance, now a roommate and friend! He is amazing and I absolutely could not have asked for a better situation. i haven't really lived with people other than a short stint in Fort Lauderdale when I lived when some people that I never saw because I worked a lot and hid in my room the rest of the time. I never ate food there, I never really hung out in any space other than my room so I am not even sure they knew I lived there. I hope I'm a good roomy and it won't turn into a sitcom situation. You know what I mean.

I am sure to get into some more details as they are appropriate but I just wanted to post a little something today to get warmed up. My writing skills are kind of sad. Get used to it. I am also going to make a "blast from the past" type entry once a week, posting an entry from my Livejournal! FUN!!

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

seriously. I'ma start this thing back up. I'm serious this time. Seriously.